Wasn't me...

Dads have had their share of wise words and sage advice over the years, but here  are the top five questionable things heard from dad.

#5. “Money doesn’t grow on trees.” Fact is, yes it does dad. For the last 200 years almost every large denomination bill in almost every currency on Earth has been printed on paper made from trees.

#4. “A borrower nor a lender be.” Fact is who’s making huge profits these
days? Banks (borrowers and lenders)!

#3. “Go ask your mom.” Fact is, we did already, that’s why we’re asking you. Mom said no.

#2. “Close the door behind you, we’re not heating the whole outside.” Fact is, we are. The mere presence of humans on earth has increased the Earth’s mean temperature by almost 10 degrees in the last 200 years.

#1. “It wasn’t me, it was the dog.” Fact is, it wasn’t the dog.

Then I noticed it wasn’t making any noise… the fan wasn’t kicking in. The fan on this laptop is notoriously noisy, so it was really obvious that it wasn’t running.

I let it cool completely, removed the battery and started it up again. This time it ran for a good 15 minutes before over heating and shutting down. So, I assumed the problem was a faulty cooling fan.

As you can see below, the techs (at our shop) were able to replace the fan and fix the cooling issue, however in the process they damaged the keyboard, so they rigged a desktop keyboard as a temporary fix.

Dell Studio 17 laptop with desktop keyboard replacement

Funny thing is, I replaced the keyboard on this Dell about a year ago. Dell support was great, they sent me the keyboard (still on warranty) and install was easy.

Here’s the service manual for the Dell 1749.

Instructions for removing the cooling fan (The Thermal Fan) are on page 28 of the manual.

Dell Thermal Fan replacement from page 28 of the manual

As you can see, removing the keyboard is necessary, so maybe have some duct tape and a  desktop keyboard standing by – just in case.

1. Login to SiteA. Select TOOLS_EXPORT (You may be asked to install the plugin. Do it.), choose the content to export. Download Export File.

Tools_Export

2. Login to SiteB. Select TOOLS_IMPORT. Select to import from WordPress. If you haven’t done this before, you will be prompted to download the import plugin. Do it. Select the file (the one you just downloaded from SiteA).

Tools_Import

If asked, download the plugin…

Change author, import attachments…

3. Done.

Notes:
I selected “Import attachments” thinking that images associated with my posts would be moved to the new site — didn’t happen.

Embedded images do appear in posts, but they source from their original URLs. So, if I remove the images from SiteA, I will need to move them to SiteB and re-embed them manually.

Click-able images still point to their original locations.

Tent caterpillar image from Wikipedia

Cool things about Tent Caterpillars…

• Their super cool science name is “Malacosoma”.
• They build “tents” in trees wherever there is morning sun.
• The tent is made of layers of silk.
• Hundreds of caterpillars will live in a tent.
• Their body temperature must be at least 15 C for their digestive system to work, so they stay in the tent to warm up before beginning their day.
• On a sunny day the temperature in the tent can get too hot and they will leave the tent and rest in shady areas.
• After eating they always return to the same tent.
• They leave a pheromone trail wherever they go, so they can follow the trail back to the tent.
• If they find a good source of food, they will return to the tent to tell the others.
• They poop out about half of the mass they ingest. When they poop it sounds like falling rain in a forest.
• They eat for 6-8 weeks (complete their cycle), do the cocoon thing for two weeks, then become moths, mate, lay eggs (their eggs can withstand mid-winter temps of -40 C) and the cycle starts again in the spring.
• They have boom bust population cycles, with peaks every ten years.

Note: In most cases eating the leaves does not kill the tree. (Wikipedia: Defoliated trees typically refoliate after caterpillar attacks and experience no lasting damage. In some cases, however, trees or parts of trees may be killed after several seasons of repeated defoliation).

Note: They have no natural enemies (they don’t taste good).

Note: There is no spray or treatment that is effective at controlling large populations, however protecting single trees might be possible… (Wikipedia: One effective way to remove them is to place a bucket 1/4 filled with water near the infected tree; the tent caterpillars will be attracted to the bucket and drown. An effective deterrent is to ring the trunk of a tree with a sticky substance, such as tar, axle grease, or Vaseline).

Funny call yesterday about the caterpillars…

Also, from 1013TheRiver.com…

Well, nothing to do but laugh about it! Here are my top five caterpillar jokes!

What does a caterpillar do first thing in the morning? Poop.
What does a caterpillar do on New Years Day? Turns over a new leaf!
What comes out of a caterpillar volcano? Larvae.
What’s green and dangerous? A caterpillar with a machine gun!
What is a caterpillar’s favourite hockey team? San Jose Sharks! (just kidding…Leafs!)

May not be a good time to camp

Mike’s top five ways to prepare for the May long weekend.

#5. Switch from spf 15 to Turtle Wax.

#4. Hide all your camping gear, before the kids find it.

#3. Stock up! It’s called the “May 2-4” weekend for a reason.

#2. Spend $75 on a fishing license and fishing gear, just to end up at the Save On fish counter by Sunday night anyway.

#1. Fill every container you own with gasoline, before the price goes thru the roof at 5pm Friday! ** It hit 142.9 Friday afternoon!!

and if you’re actually contemplating going camping this weekend, here are the top five signs you need to invest in an RV.

#5. After tenting last year on the May long weekend, you ended up with both frostbite AND sunburn.

#4. You caught your kids on craigslist offer to sell a Coleman stove, lantern and tent, cheap!

#3. Your tent trailer doubles as a wheelbarrow in the off season.

#2. One night in the rain, shivering in the fetal position, while watching vulture-sized mosquitoes carry off your Shih Tzu, is one night too many.

#1. Puss filled, blotchy, swollen eyes and face from a rare combination of mosquito bites, allergies and using gasoline to start the campfire.

Happy Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day is coming up on Sunday, so here are some things that mom really wants for Mother’s Day. Mike’s top five things mom really wants for Mother’s Day.

#5. To eat an entire meal without the discussion of human bodily functions at the table.

#4. Go shopping at the mall without the “why is this person my mother” look.

#3. At least five minutes in the bathroom without someone knocking on the door because they can’t find something.

#2. Not the entire Die Hard series on Blue Ray, not a kettle, not a good sturdy shovel (unless you want to wear it).

#1. I believe the correct formula is; hours of labour multiplied by years of service, expressed in dollars (rounded up).

More on Mother’s Day here…

My Mother taught me well

Just in time for Mother’s Day… I’m not sure where this came from, but it sure is right-on.

The top five things my mother taught me…

#5. My mother taught me logic. “If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

#4. My mother taught me irony. “Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”

#3. My mother taught me about the science of osmosis. “Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

#2. My mother taught me about contortion-ism. “Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”

#1. My mother taught me religion. “You better pray that stain comes out of the carpet.”

Southern Methodist University, Central University Libraries, DeGolyer Library

According to wikiHow…

On May 5, 1862, the Mexican Army, against all odds, defeated French forces in the Battle of Puebla. On Cinco de Mayo (Spanish for the 5th of May), many Mexicans around the world celebrate their Mexican ancestry and people of all backgrounds can take the time to appreciate Mexican culture.

Usually Cinco de Mayo is celebrated with parades, special dinners and Mexican themed parties (Hummus Brothers are doing a special Cinco de Mayo day here).

If you’re looking for an alternative way to celebrate Cinco de Mayo, I have some other suggestions…

#5. Quickly fly to Mexico and immerse yourself in the culture. Or walk around the back yard in sandals and tacky tourist ware asking where the cabana is.

#4. Tell that joke about the sheep’s favourite Christmas song: Fleece Navidad.

#3. Have mayo on everything (BOOOO!).

#2. Gather ’round the TV and watch game three. No wait, that would be Cinco de Sharks-o.

#1. Hot fries, hot gravy, guacamole, salsa and cheese curd all baked in a taco shell crust (hangin’ from the ceiling…) and you have a Poutine Piñata!

Earth

Earth Day 2013 is Monday April 22, 2013

More info here…

If you are looking for new and “different” ways to celebrate Earth Day, here are some suggestions…

#5. Make clever gifts for each other using only materials that are found on Earth like, gold, silver, chocolate, rubber, wood, plastic, mercury, bacon, ducks, etc…

#4. Throw a big party for Earth but don’t invite Megatron, Loki or any Romulans. Do invite Bruce Willis, Ben Affleck and Steve Buscemi.

#3. Calculate your Carbon Footprint and then make it you Facebook status for the day! (Example: Mine is 19.9 metric tons)

#2. Watch the movie 2012, but shut it off right before the global cataclysm.

#2a. Show compassion for faux-planets like Pluto but never let them forget you got your own day!

#1. Use less energy by avoiding unnecessary switching of radio channels.

Happy Earth Day. I hope we win Planet of The Year again this year!

Photograph by: @aspensmithers , Twitter

Did you hear the one about the moose that wandered into a Safeway store in Smithers?

Details here -> Safeway shoppers in Smithers get surprise visit from moose.

So, why did the moose walk into the Safeway store? [I understand the real story is that customers where feeding the moose apples in the parking lot, til the moose made his way in thru the automatic doors.]

Top five reasons why that moose was in the Safeway store.

#5. Needed change. No quarter for a buggy.

#4. Great price on mangos.

#3. Whoops. Clean up in aisle 3, 4 and 5.

#2. Heard there was a hot Alpaca workin’ the deli counter.

#1. “Out all night with Rocky, Boris and Natasha – thought this was my place. My bad.”