The Academy Awards will be televised Sunday night. A lot of people are celebrating the Oscars by throwing Oscar Parties. Some of these parties can be pretty fancy, where everyone dresses up and gets the red carpet treatment. But, they’re not all “fancy”. These are the top five signs you’re at a lousy Oscar party.
#5. Guests sit cross-legged on a red dog blanket in front of a 14-inch TV .
#4. Part way through the party Charlie Sheen walks down the stairs, takes a look at everyone and goes back up the stairs.
#3. Instead of the standard meat and cheese tray, the host opts for a cheese log in the shape of Brad Pitt’s butt from Moneyball.
#2. One of the bedrooms is kept locked and it has a cat door. (and instead of a fancy hand towel in the washroom, the dog just comes in and lets you pet him.)
#1. Instead of Wolfgang Puck’s signature gold encrusted chocolate Oscar statuettes – you get a handful melted leftover Kit Kats from Halloween.
#1a. The Best Picture Oscar goes to Johnny English: Reborn.
fyi… up for Best Picture: The Artist, The Descendants, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, The Help, Hugo, Midnight In Paris, Moneyball, The Tree Of Life and War Horse.
Jennifer Brandle McCall was in yesterday to talk about nominations for this year’s Business Excellence Awards. Mike’s top five signs maybe your business is not going to win a business excellence award this year.
#5. Your slogan “Let us hold your keys while you shop” seems to be a little misunderstood by local law enforcement.
#4. Your idea of “Pay now! No merchandise til June 2012!”, doesn’t seem to be working as well as you expected.
#3. While customers try stuff on, you like to try on their stuff.
#2. Your company policy prohibits you from saying which guy you got all your stuff from.
#1. Your sign says lemonade stand, but most of the time you’re sitting.