Tagged: food

#Valentine’s Day gift ideas (cheap)!

Yummy
Yummy

If you don’t have a lot money to spend on your sweetheart this year, you might be looking for some cheap Valentine’s Day gift ideas — so we asked our Facebook friends for some advice…

  • Make a card
  • Don’t buy anything. It’s really cheap that way. :) lol
  • Lap dance ;-)
  • Home made dinner, book of homemade coupons for foot rubs and kitty litter cleanings
  • Buy yourself a present. You got to love yourself too.
  • Giving her money to buy her own gift..
  • No roses…. Buy other flowers… Roses have a crazy markup on v day
  • My hubby loves chocolate, so I’m making him a chocolate cupcake bouquet! Google it, their pretty cool!
  • An IOU for flowers on the 15th when all the left overs are marked down..?
  • Just be single and stay single! men are all liars n scam artists anyhow ;-)

Here are five more…
#5. A nicely framed list of all the things your mother said you should look for in a mate.
#4. Spell out her name with Kit Kats and red suckers from last year’s Halloween stash.
#3. Spell out her name in the snow.
#2. Remember, there’s no better way to show respect and admiration for someone than good sturdy handshake (be sure to wash your hands first if you also did number three).
#1. Remember nothin’ says lovin’ like a heart shaped meatloaf in the oven (and that’s not a euphemism for something, I mean an actual meatloaf in the oven)!

How to prepare for #GroundhogDay


Groundhog day is February 2nd. Mike’s top five ways to have fun on Groundhog Day.
#5. Watch the Bill Murray movie Groundhog Day, then watch it again the next day and the next day…
#4. Go around the office all day making crude jokes about seeing ‘Willy’s shadow.’
#3. Go around telling everyone that Whiarton Willy did not see his shadow again last year – because he’s been dead for 11 years.
#2. Get up on the morning, put on your Wookie costume, run around the backyard screaming “me shadow, me shadow, I can’ts finds me shadow”.
#1. A pile of fake fur on the kitchen floor, a large box of Groundhog Helper on the counter and let the kids figure it out for themselves.

Floss, polish and reclamation

So, don’t you love going to the dentist for a cleaning? Your teeth feel so smooth and clean. You can go like this “thhhhhh” between every tooth. We know we’re suppose to clean our teeth like that after every meal, right? But we don’t. It’s not that we can’t clean our own teeth or we don’t know how. It’s just better when someone else does it.

I was thinking, how about we set up Floss N’ Go booths at the mall food court? Finish your lunch, you pop in there and for like 5.99 they professionally floss your teeth and you get on with your day.

Maybe there would be 6.99 ‘flossing and polish’ special too, or the 8.99 ‘floss, polish and reclamation’ special? With the ‘floss, polish and reclamation’ special the FPR. They could baggy all the remnant food bits they collect from your mouth and you could take them home for the dog or for a snack for later. Okay.. that’s gross.

Things that sound funny when talking about Slow Cookers

The slow cooker is something I have used for a long time, I just love the idea of slow cooked food for some reason. However, while I was reading up on slow cookery, I found a few operational instructions that sound quite amusing. Mike’s top five things that sound funny when you’re talking about slow cookers.
#5. Discontinue use if cord is severed.
#4. Do not poke chicken.
#3. Immersing in cold water may damage the crock.
#2. Probe to be used to determine meat temperature only.
#1. Precautions should be taken as the porcelain bowl may become slippery.

Your turkey dinner might contain high levels of pesticides

Not to ruin your Thanksgiving dinner, but, two years ago The Suzuki Foundation released a report saying that the average Thanksgiving dinner was chalk full of pesticides. Mike’s top five signs your turkey dinner might contain high levels of pesticides.

#5. Fewer flies than usual hovering over the center piece.

#4. Fewer flies than usual hovering over passed-out dinner guests.

#3. David Suzuki and a guy with a clipboard sitting at the far end of the table all evening – giggling.

#2. That after-dinner bloated feeling replaced by an urge to sting whomever just passed you the broccoli.

#1. You find yourself reminiscing about the “good old days” when turkey dinners just contained high levels of melamine.