American Idol starts tonight & The River’s Breakfast Idol starts next week…

American Idol kicks off tonight. You can usually spot the really bad ones, before they even perform. But, do they know they’re bad? Top five signs maybe you’re the next American Idol loser.
#5. While in the waiting room, you are wedgied more than twice by Ryan Seacrest.
#4. On the way to the audition, you realize you left your kazoo in your other overalls.
#3. Everyone in your Star Wars chat group is telling you, you’re are awesome!!
#2. At a certain point during your audition you are forced to stop and step back 4 ½ feet, as per your restraining order.
#1. After 40 minutes of trying to get Steven Tyler to belly dance you realize you’re at American Idol and not The River’s Breakfast Idol.
Breakfast Idol starts next week – as contestants vi for Tim Bits and Bacon & Eggers. The judges have selected the top five contestants. Mike’s top five reasons why you were not selected to be a contestant on Breakfast Idol.
#5. Last time you were on the morning show – you just got up and left after a year!
#4. You’re not really a morning person.
#3. You’re already making over $8.50/hour.
#2. You already have Mike Benny’s autograph.
#1. It’s always been a dream of yours to be on a high quality, topical, always entertaining morning show.