Mike's top five

Dear Benny & Rae,
Father says if you hear it on The River, it must be so. Father also says there is no one more cynical than Mike Benny. That’s why I’m asking you this question. Is there a Santa Claus? The kids at school all say there isn’t. They laugh and poke fun when I say there is. Would you please settle this once and for all and answer my question?
Yours truly, Virginia

Dear Virginia,
Those kids at school are wrong. They’re jaded and much like myself becoming more and more cynical. But, sometimes cynicism can work for you. Of course there is a Santa Claus. Here are three reasons why I know this.
Virginia, there is a trillion dollar retail industry built around the belief in his existence. Ask your friends if all those people are wrong. Is some trickster is pulling the wool over the eyes of Walmart, Sears, The Bay or Canadian Tire?
What about all those politicians who wish us a generic Happy Seasonal salutation. If there wasn’t a Santa Claus why would they so vehemently deny his existence.
But most of all Virginia. No letter to Santa sent through the mail has ever been “returned to sender”. So I ask you, what’s more likely, there is a Santa Claus or the world’s post offices are all collaborating in a colossal global conspiracy?
And who keeps taking a bite from that cookie?
Yes Virginia of course there is a Santa Claus!!

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