Tag: flu

Steps to avoid spreading the flu

from wikipedia

The flu is starting to circulate around here, people are dropping like flies.

The radio station is taking steps to avoid spreading the flu, as a matter of fact we are taking five steps to avoid spreading the flu.

#5. Surgical masks, rubbing alcohol and Swiffers are now available at the reception desk for all visiting guests.

#4. Not only washing our own hands, but now the Traffic Dept. will wash all visitors and guests hands as well.

#3. Instead of the DJ’s shaking hands with guests and visitors we now just wave and nervously smile from the other side of the protective glass.

#2. “Staying home when you don’t feel well” has been replaced with “coming to work and working, but keeping to yourself and not touching anyone else’s stuff”.

#1. Each DJ will now be issued their own 20 pack of Tim Bits instead of the usual communal 900 pack that they usually just dump in the hall.

#1a. The breaktime ritual of all the DJ’s passing around one juice box and taking a sip has been replaced by group visits to the 2nd floor fountain.

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No flu shot

It’s flu shot season. Do you get a flu shot this year? Do they work? What if you get one and your co-workers don’t? There are a lot of questions about flu shots. These are the top five benefits of NOT getting a flu shot.
#5. No one asks you to pass them anything.
#4. One fake cough and no one sits beside you at the staff meeting.
#3. Chasing people who did get the flu shot with your fake vomit all over the office.
#2. Pretending to do a giant sneeze – then looking around at everyone and yelling – “didn’t get me yet, ha ha ha!”.
#1. You might actually really be sick when you phone in sick this winter.

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