Last year it was killer clowns, this year it’s IT clowns… Every year as Halloween approaches people start talking about how Halloween is getting too scary, particularly for young kids. So here are some suggestions for making Halloween less scary (for young kids).
#5. Clowns must only call you into the sewer if there really is cool stuff down there.
#4. All ghosts must wear a sign stating whether they are real or pretend ghosts.
#3. ‘Bobbing for apples’ will replaced with ‘selecting apple slices from a shallow bowl of bottled water’.
#2. All fake blood must be green so it doesn’t look real (unless it’s from an alien creature..).
#1. Remember the true spirit of Halloween is not in scaring children, it’s in being up to your armpits in Reese’s peanut butter cups!!
It seemed like not as many kids as usual were out trick or treating last night. Mike’s top five reasons why there might have been fewer kids at your door this year.
#5. You inadvertently answered the door while cleaning your chainsaw and your goalie mask.
#4. You were answering the door in your bath robe – holding a smoke in one hand – a tall gin and tonic in the other hand – telling all the kids that you were out of candy but “here’s a handful of Aspirin”.
#3. I guess that rabid snow monkey tied to the post, throwing fecal matter at people in the front yard was more effective than you thought it would be.
#2. The crazy cat lady from the morning show, wouldn’t give you any candy til she correctly guessed your age – – and it takes forrrrrrrevvvvvver!
#1. Ya, I guess shutting off all the lights and hiding in the basement worked again! All the more for me!