Yesterday was Mother’s Day. How can you tell if mom was happy with her day? Top five ways to tell mom wasn’t too happy with Mother’s Day.
#5. This mornings coffee has more than a slight hint of nutmeg.
#4. Usual pressed shirt replaced with a slightly damp sweater that smells like the dog.
#3. Instead of lunches for the kids – brown paper bags full of poop.
#2. Usual quiet ride to school is replaced with hysterical, uber white-knuckle, “Grand theft Auto 4” level-ten, type ride.
#1. Before serving dinner tonight – mom reenacts a scene from the movie 300. Wearing a Spartan warrior costume – she shouts “tonight we dine in *ell”!
Things Mom Would Never Say
“How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?”
“Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too”
“Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery”
“Let me smell that shirt — Yeah, it’s good for another week”
“Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I’ll be glad to feed and walk him every day”
“Well, if Rahul’s mamma says it’s OK, that’s good enough for me.”
“The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It’s not like I’m running a prison around here.”
“Don’t bother wearing a jacket – the wind-chill is bound to improve”
“I don’t have a tissue with me … just use your sleeve”
via Mother’s Day Humor,Mothers Day Jokes,Humorous Quotes on Mothers,Jokes on Mothers Day.