Tag: Thanksgiving

How long do you cook a turkey?

turkey-cooked
Happy Thanksgiving!

To save you the trouble of Googling this…

from About.Com Home Cooking…

Keep in mind the most important number is the temperature of the bird. The internal temperature of the bird should be 170°F (77°C) in the breast and 180°F (82°C) in the thigh when done.

Roasting times are for a preheated 325 degree oven.

Approximate Roasting Times for Stuffed Turkey
Turkey Weight Hours
6 to 8 pounds 3 to 3-1/2 hours
8 to 12 pounds 3-1/2 to 4-1/2 hours
12 to 16 pounds 4-1/2 to 5-1/2 hours
16 to 20 pounds 5-1/2 to 6 hours
20 to 24 pounds 6 to 6-1/2 hours
Approximate Roasting Times for Unstuffed Turkey
Turkey Weight Hours
6 to 8 pounds 2-1/2 to 3 hours
8 to 12 pounds 3 to 4 hours
12 to 16 pounds 4 to 5 hours
16 to 20 pounds 5 to 5-1/2 hours
20 to 24 pounds 5-1/2 to 6 hours

If you don’t have the time for a full-on baked turkey dinner, there’s always this option…

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Mike’s top five signs it’s a #StarWars #Thanksgiving

image from http://stephenhayford.com
Star Wars Thanksgiving

It’s Thanksgiving weekend (here in Canada) and I’m thinking about doing a “Star Wars” themed dinner this year. Mike’s top five signs it’s a Star Wars Thanksgiving.

#5. Count Dooku cuts off your right arm after you pass him the stuffing.

#4. Every few minutes someone says “Luke… use the fork…”.

#3. Your friends Howard, Sheldon and Leonard can make it to dinner, but Penny is “too busy” to make it.

#2. Instead of the Heimlich Maneuver, if someone is choking, you just slit them open like a Tauntaun with your light-saber and crawl inside for a look.

#1. Sith’s won’t pass anything to Wookiees!

also… Sith’s also won’t eat wookies for Thanksgiving. They find them a little chewy. Thnx Bill!

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Really bad and super corny Thanksgiving jokes

turkey-cookedKnock Knock. Who’s there? Aida. Aida who? Aida lot more than I should have.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Arthur. Arthur who? Arthur any leftovers?

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dewey. Dewey who? Dewey have to wait long to eat?

from here…

Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? A: Pumpkin pi.

Q: Why do pilgrims pants keep falling down? A: Because their belt buckles are on their hats!

Q: Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive? A: It had 24 carrots.

from here…

What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son?  If your papa could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!

Knock Knock.  Who’s there?  Tamara.  Tamara who?  Tamara we’ll have turkey leftovers!
How can you make a turkey float?  You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey.

from here…

One of my own…

How does Luke Skywalker like to eat his turkey dinner? He uses the fork.

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Your turkey dinner might contain high levels of pesticides

FreeRange2Not to ruin your Thanksgiving dinner, but, two years ago The Suzuki Foundation released a report saying that the average Thanksgiving dinner was chalk full of pesticides. Mike’s top five signs your turkey dinner might contain high levels of pesticides.

#5. Fewer flies than usual hovering over the center piece.

#4. Fewer flies than usual hovering over passed-out dinner guests.

#3. David Suzuki and a guy with a clipboard sitting at the far end of the table all evening – giggling.

#2. That after-dinner bloated feeling replaced by an urge to sting whomever just passed you the broccoli.

#1. You find yourself reminiscing about the “good old days” when turkey dinners just contained high levels of melamine.

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Had enough to eat

monty-pythonThey say, the average Canadian Thanksgiving dinner will be over 2,000 calories — more than the average adult should have in an entire day. Top Five Ways to tell when you’ve had enough to eat.
#5. Can’t see your feet?
#4. Can’t see your arms!? (Eating by feel..)
#3. You really aren’t sure — if it was you or the dog..
#2. That pain in your fork hand, from Carpul Turkey Syndrome!
#1. You’re no longer eating to satisfy hunger or taste — you’re simply trying to maintain a stable ballast so you don’t capsize.

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